Testi Soundtracks :: W

There's some as don't care

When they put down a plate

There's a sound

Not with me

When they move a chair

It'll scrape with a grate

On the ground

Not with me

I will have my hand right

When I place a glass

Notice how I stand right

As customers pass

Serve a demitass

With a gesture so gentile

Or do it again 'til

It's near oriental



Da da da da dum dum



It's an art

It's an art

To be a fine waitress

To see that you pleasure each guest

There's a twist

To my wrist

If I let a fork drop

Or cut up a porkchop

Or serve a New York chop

It all needs be stylish and smart

That's what makes it an art



I remember one day

As I do now and then I had shakes

And down I went

There with my tray

Full of seven prime tenderloin steaks

And down I went

But I kept my poise

Not one guest heard me fall

Never made a noise

Not one noise food and all

If you have to crawl

You give 'em what they like

You carry your tray like

It's almost ballet-like



La la la la la la la la la la la la la la



It's an art

It's an art

To be a fine waitress

Each evening I treasure the test

Though my chef

May be deaf

I stay diplomatic

If I give him static

He might burn the haddock

Or put too much salt in a tart

Even that is an art



Tips? HA!

Tips are important

For people like captains and barmen

For them it's a tips, see?

For me, I'm a gypsy

Just toss me a coin

And I suddenly feel like I'm Carmen



So on through the ulcer

The backache

The hot, sweaty feet

On you go

Through, "Is your knife dull, sir?"

And, "Madam wants WHAT whith her meat?"

On you go

Two AM approches

The curtains decsend

There among the roaches

My act's at an end

Every night I tend

To find myself crying

There's no work so trying

Or so satisfying



I tell everybody that I'm a waitress and I'm proud.

Somebody comes up to me and says, "Hey you're terrific.

How come you're just a waitress?" Ya know what I say to them?

I say, "Why? Don't you think you deserve to be dserved by me?"



It's an art

GUESTS

Miss!

WAITRESS

It's an art

GUESTS

Miss!

WAITRESS

To be a great waitress

GUESTS

Please take care of this

WAITRESS

To do without leisure or rest

GUESTS

Could we have our check please?

WAITRESS

So I zoom

GUESTS

Miss!

WAITRESS

Through the room

GUESTS

Miss!

WAITRESS

With a flair no one else has

GUESTS

Bring some more of these

Waitress

An air no one else has

I swear no one else has

My lilt

GUESTS

Miss!

WAITRESS

When I say

GUESTS

Miss!

WAITRESS

"A la carte"

GUESTS

And another order to go

WAITRESS

You can see it gives me a glow

GUESTS

My plate, miss!

My cup, miss!

WAITRESS

Ev'rytime I prove I'm a pro

GUESTS

I'm late, miss!

Hurry up, miss!

WAITRESS

Maybe I'm not quite

GUESTS

Miss!

WAITRESS

Michealangelo

GUESTS

And a bag for my dog

WAITRESS

But I'm not just a waitress

GUESTS

You were great

WAITRESS

I'm a one

GUESTS

But I'm late

WAITRESS

Woman

GUESTS

My check please

My change please

WAITRESS

Show

GUESTS

C'mon please

Lady, let's go